Development of the programme of study

Posted in Uncategorized on January 31, 2010 by billylai

In processing the final outcome, I decided to expand from what I have done for 101 Don’ts and 10x10x10. I purposed to produce a series of collection about etiquette and manners in 4 categories: general (in street/public), public transport, smoking and table manners. Research is done specifically on the 4 sections.

Smoking manners:

In the 1930’s and 40’s a much larger portion of the population smoked than does today. For this reason smoking was much more socially accepted. Whereas today smokers are constantly being looked down upon and accused of harming others with their second hand smoke, in the past it was not considered polite to object to anothers smoking habits. In the 1990’s it might be considered bad etiquette to smoke in the home of a non-smoker, but back then hosts were expected to supply ashtrays and even cigarettes or cigars for all of their guests. Smoking was also much more accepted in public places such as stores, and restaurants. As Emily Post put it, “those who smoke outnumber those who do not by a hundred to one … [so] they … must learn to adapt themselves to existing conditions … and when they come into contact with smokers, it is scarcely fair that the few should be allowed to prohibit the many from the pursuit of their comforts and their pleasures (Post 37).”

Only the most inconsiderate things a smoker could do were considered bad etiquette during the 30’s and 40’s. When at another person’s home this included putting a cigar or cigarette out on something that might be damaged, setting one down somewhere and letting it burn, causing a burn hole in any other way, or ashing in the wrong place (such as a plant). Conversely it was expected that any good host or hostess would provide a plethora of ashtrays for their guests. It was only considered bad manners to smoke at a host’s dinner table if the host did not light up first. In fact most people provided matches and cigarettes at every place setting when they entertained guests for dinner. Similarly a sickroom visitor would be considered rude if he or she smoked unless the patient suggests it or is smoking theirself. Other good smoking manners included not entering a host or hostess’ room with an already lighted cigarette, as well as not answering the door for guests with one. The only other rules of smoking etiquette were common courtesies such as not blowing smoke into the face of someone who isn’t smoking and making sure to immediately return a borrowed book of matches. Today smokers are constantly forced to check for no smoking signs or ask another’s permission to light up, but during the 30’s and 40’s it was a smoker’s world and the habit was accepted in almost any situation and setting.

Light your cigarette away from others. When you light your cigarette, hold your cigarette in a direction away from those around you, cover it and puff lightly to get the cigarette lit. This keeps smoke from blowing toward others.

Watch where you ash your cigarette butts. The polite way to ash a cigarette is to rest your cigarette on an ash tray and allow the ashes to fall off by themselves. Tapping your cigarette butts off your cigarette is viewed as rude.

Puff the cigarette. When you’re in public, the polite way to smoke a cigarette is to gently puff on it.

Relax and enjoy your cigarette. Taking your time while smoking your cigarette is viewed as polite. If you appear rushed and in a hurry to finish your cigarette, that is rude behavior.

Monitor the reactions of those around you when smoking. Blow your exhalation smoke away from the group you are with. If you notice someone disturbed by your cigarette smoke, apologize and either put out your cigarette or move the cigarette and the ashes farther away from the group.

Public transport:

Talking. Loud talking on public transportation is ill-mannered and offensive. Never shout or talk so loud it disturbs other passengers.

Cellphones. Place the cellphone on vibrate. No one likes hearing several cellphones ringing in unison while commuting on public transportation. This is disturbing to passengers and the driver.

Music. Commuters who like to listen to music during their ride on
public transportation should wear headphones. Don’t assault the people around you with loud music. This is poor etiquette and rude. Not everyone shares the same musical taste as you do! And many might find the music offensive.

Smoking. Signs all around point out no smoking is allowed on public transportation but a few offenders ignore this law. Respect other commuters/riders by waiting until the end of the ride to smoke a cigarette.

Food. Public transportation is not the place to chow down on a hamburger and guzzle a beer. It is against the rules and very offensive to others. Plus, food and drink might easily spill over on fellow riders causing a hazardous situation.

Seniors/Disabled. The seats near the front of the bus are designated for seniors and the disabled. Don’t plop down in these seats. Find another available seat.

Common Courtesy. This is especially for the young men out there. Common courtesy seems to be a part of a bygone era but if you see an elderly person, or pregnant woman, offer them your seat. This is just plain old fashioned common courtesy and the person probably would greatly appreciate such a gracious move.

Table manners:

Always be on time to the dinner table. Being late to dinner is not accepted in many cultures because it is considered to be rude. If you are late to dinner you may not have enough food to eat or there might be a spot for you at the table simply because you were late. However, things do happen and sometimes we have no choice but to be late. If you are late and can’t help it, it’s recommended that you call ahead so that the person fixing the dinner can make enough food for you and keep your spot at the table.

Avoid chewing or talking with food in your mouth. Chewing or talking with food in your mouth is a horrible display of manners. If you are having a family dinner it would be pretty rude to be talking with food in your mouth and have food come out of your mouth. Also, your dinner mates may not want to see what’s being tossed around in your mouth. It is recommended that you wait until you swallow your food then say what you need to say.

Don’t be obscene. Being obscene at the dinner table can cause your dinner mates to not want to eat around you anymore. You should practice shunning dinner obscenity by eliminating the following things: use of swearing words, arguing, making funny or ugly faces, and other common obscenities. If you are going to act in an obscene way, it is recommended that you excuse yourself from the dinner table, or wait until after dinner



Posted in Uncategorized on January 31, 2010 by billylai

Start off by 101 PLEASE DO NOT s

After researching on the topic, I have a well understanding of etiquette and manners. I have sorted out the most common and general ones and put them together to produce a little guide. It is a small guide which introduces a list (101) of “please do not …” points about some common etiquette and manners that we should be aware of and to behave ourselves. It is concise, easy to read and understand for children, teens and adults. It is a portable guide that people can bring it with them all the time to remind themselves or share with others. It is quite interesting or surprising that there could be a number of etiquette that you have not noticed before.

Research: Internet

Posted in Uncategorized on January 31, 2010 by billylai

Emily Post—the most trusted name in etiquette—has always been there to help people navigate every conceivable social situation. The tradition continues with this 100 percent revised and updated edition, which covers the formal, the traditional, the contemporary, and the casual.

The Emily Post Institute, created by Emily in 1946 and run today by third generation family members, serves as a “civility barometer” for American society and continues Emily’s work. That work has grown to address the societal concerns of the 21st century including business etiquette, raising polite children and civility in America.

Emily Post’s Etiquette, 17th Edition also remains the definitive source for timeless advice on entertaining, social protocol, table manners, guidelines for religious ceremonies, expressing condolences, introductions, how to be a good houseguest and host, invitations, correspondence, planning a wedding, giving a toast, and sportsmanship.

The article briefly explains what etiquette is. It also mentioned why it is important to know etiquette as it helps govern one’s behaviour. Different countries have different cultures and etiquette may differ.

Contain a series of articles published that is related to etiquette

Manners International is a multifaceted consulting corporation that provides etiquette and protocol workshops, instructional videos, interactive online learning solutions and instructional kits.

Manners International’s workshops and media products are designed to meet the growing demand for effective manners, etiquette and protocol improvement solutions.

Etiquette and protocol are society’s guideposts for recognizing and respecting other individuals, cultures and customs. Manners International provides the needed knowledge to respond to domestic or international business and social situations for the new millennium.

Debrett’s is the modern authority on all matters etiquette, taste and achievement. Recognising people of distinction and the finer things in life are true to Debrett’s heritage, rooted in publishing chronicles of the great and the good over the past two centuries.

Debrett’s range of modern etiquette publications such as Debrett’s A-Z of Modern Manners, Debrett’s Wedding Guide, Debrett’s Correct Form, Debrett’s Etiquette for Girls and Debrett’s Guide for the Modern Gentleman are acclaimed, indispensable references in a world where ‘getting it right’ is more and more important with conventions less and less understood.

In the book – A-Z of Modern Manners, the content includes: apologising, babies, chivalry, drunkenness, eavesdropping, funerals, guests, honesty, invitations, jargon, kissing, laughing, mobiles, nannies, office parties, proposals, queuing, restaurants, swearing, tipping, underwear, vulgarity, wine, xenophobia, yawning, zips, etc. It is Debrett’s first book defining modern manners in over a decade. It provides a comprehensive review of traditional codes of conduct, which is entertaining and refreshing with an insight into new social challenges and modern dilemmas.

Etiquette & Manners presents contemporary fundamental etiquette programs which are universally accepted for children, young adults and adults.  This is accomplished by providing leadership and lifetime skills through good manners and proper etiquette in the highest professional manner.

Lisa Melchiorri is the Founder and Director of Etiquette & Manners.  Ms. Melchiorri received her training under Dorothea Johnson, the Founder of The Protocol School of Washington, the leader and first company to provide professional training and certification in etiquette and protocol in the United States of America.  As a graduate of The Protocol School of Washington, Ms. Melchiorri is providing the highest quality programs available to her clients.  Ms. Melchiorri has over 18 years of experience on Wall Street — between New York City and Boston — as Director of Operations and Administration during which she hired, trained and supervised staff and was responsible for the allocation of $10 million.  More recently, she was an integral part of a management team for an accredited graduate school, where she created the financial aid department and implemented all its processes and procedures.

There are a few articles written on guide to general public etiquette.

It contains a list of manners for different situation.

It consists of a list about how to have good manners

It is about table manners.

The writer introduces the importance of etiquette and manners in a society. He stated that ‘’the fabric of public society lies in the manners of the individuals that make up that society. To hold this fabric together, you have to have those manners. If you don’t have them, then public society will kick you out.’’

The writer opened this blog in response to the worldwide epidemic of bad manners that seems to be growing at an astonishing rate. He posts entries about different public manners and etiquette.

‘’Etiquette isn’t just for Emily Post and stuffy snobs. Good manners make good first impressions, and can impact how well people like you. ‘’

A guide of manners and etiquette, divided into number of categories from a-z,for example, pets, business, telephone, e-mail, funeral, table manners, office, school, etc

It provides workshops/courses for people to join, and get trained on how to teach the teens about etiquette and manners.

Research: book

Posted in Uncategorized on January 31, 2010 by billylai

The most well known composer on etiquette is Etiquette in Society, in Business, in Politics and at home written by Emily Post in 1922. (The content of the book can be referred to


On Manners and Etiquette

Manners are made up of trivialities of deportment which can be easily learned if one does not happen to know them; manner is personality—the outward manifestation of one’s innate character and attitude toward life…. Etiquette must, if it is to be of more than trifling use, include ethics as well as manners. Certainly what one is, is of far greater importance than what one appears to be.—Chap. I¶6–7

On Selflessness

Unconsciousness of self is not so much unselfishness as it is the mental ability to extinguish all thought of one’s self—exactly as one turns out the light.—Chap. XXIX¶20

On Self-Reliance

There is no reason why you should be bored when you can be otherwise. But if you find yourself sitting in the hedgerow with nothing but weeds, there is no reason for shutting your eyes and seeing nothing, instead of finding what beauty you may in the weeds. To put it cynically, life is too short to waste it in drawing blanks. Therefore, it is up to you to find as many pictures to put on your blank pages as possible.—Chap. VII¶34

On Expression

The phrases that a man might devise to close a letter to his betrothed or his wife are bound only by the limit of his imagination and do not belong in this, or any, book.—Chap. XXVII¶40

There is a quality of protectiveness in a man’s expression as it falls on his betrothed, as though she were so lovely a breath might break her; and in the eyes of a girl whose love is really deep, there is always evidence of that most beautiful look of championship, as though she thought: “No one else can possibly know how wonderful he is!”—Chap. XX¶35

The letter we all love to receive is one that carries so much of the writer’s personality that she seems to be sitting beside us, looking at us directly and talking just as she really would, could she have come on a magic carpet, instead of sending her proxy in ink-made characters on mere paper.—Chap. XXVIII¶56

On the Opera

Excepting a religious ceremonial, there is no occasion where greater dignity of manner is required of ladies and gentlemen both, than in occupying a box at the opera. For a gentleman especially no other etiquette is so exacting.—Chap. VI¶1

On Slang

The most vulgar slang is scarcely worse than the attempted elegance which those unused to good society imagine to be the evidence of cultivation.—Chap. VIII¶2

The fact that slang is apt and forceful makes its use irresistibly tempting. Coarse or profane slang is beside the mark, but “flivver,” “taxi,” the “movies,” “deadly” (meaning dull), “feeling fit,” “feeling blue,” “grafter,” a “fake,” “grouch,” “hunch” and “right o!” are typical of words that it would make our spoken language stilted to exclude.—Chap. VIII¶15

On the Single Woman

The pretty young woman living alone, must literally follow Cinderella’s habits. The magpie never leaves her window sill and the jackal sits on the doormat, and the news of her every going out and coming in, of every one whom she receives, when they come, how long they stay and at what hour they go, is spread broadcast.—Chap. XIX¶26

On Opulence

The difference between the great house with twenty to fifty guest rooms, all numbered like the rooms in a hotel, and the house of ordinary good size with from four to six guest rooms, or the farmhouse or small cottage which has but one “best” spare chamber, with perhaps a “man’s room” on the ground floor, is much the same as the difference between the elaborate wedding and the simplest—one merely of degree and not of kind.—Chap. XXV¶1

On the Limits of Politeness

Alas! it is true: “Be polite to bores and so shall you have bores always round about you.”—Chap. VII¶34

On Litter-bugs

People who picnic along the public highway leaving a clutter of greasy paper and swill (not a pretty name, but neither is it a pretty object!) for other people to walk or drive past, and to make a breeding place for flies, and furnish nourishment for rats, choose a disgusting way to repay the land-owner for the liberty they took in temporarily occupying his property.—Chap. V¶26

On the Fresh

“Keep your hands to yourself!” might almost be put at the head of the first chapter of every book on etiquette.—Chap. X¶97

On Child-rearing

Training a child is exactly like training a puppy; a little heedless inattention and it is out of hand immediately; the great thing is not to let it acquire bad habits that must afterward be broken. Any child can be taught to be beautifully behaved with no effort greater than quiet patience and perseverance, whereas to break bad habits once they are acquired is a Herculean task.—Chap. XXXV¶2

Children are all more or less little monkeys in that they imitate everything they see. If their mother treats them exactly as she does her visitors they in turn play “visitor” to perfection. Nothing hurts the feelings of children more than not being allowed to behave like grown persons when they think they are able.—Chap. XXXV¶21

Nothing appeals to children more than justice, and they should be taught in the nursery to “play fair” in games, to respect each other’s property and rights, to give credit to others, and not to take too much credit to themselves.—Chap. XXXV¶29

On Patience

There is a big deposit of sympathy in the bank of love, but don’t draw out little sums every hour or so—so that by and by, when perhaps you need it badly, it is all drawn out and you yourself don’t know how or on what it was spent.—Chap. XXXVI¶19

On Smoking

One very great annoyance in open air gatherings is cigar smoke when blown directly in one’s face or worse yet the smoke from a smouldering cigar. It is almost worthy of a study in air currents to discover why with plenty of space all around, a tiny column of smoke will make straight for the nostrils of the very one most nauseated by it!—Chap. VI¶48

On Boston

Best Society in Boston having kept its social walls intact, granting admission only to those of birth and breeding, has therefore preserved a quality of unmistakable cultivation. There are undoubtedly other cities, especially in the South, which have also kept their walls up and their traditions intact—but Boston has been the wise virgin as well, and has kept her lamp filled.—Chap. XVII¶21

On the Life of the Party

The joy of joys is the person of light but unmalicious humor. If you know any one who is gay, beguiling and amusing, you will, if you are wise, do everything you can to make him prefer your house and your table to any other; for where he is, the successful party is also.—Chap. VII¶11

On the Wedding Veil

As for her veil in its combination of lace or tulle and orange blossoms, perhaps it is copied from a head-dress of Egypt or China, or from the severe drapery of Rebecca herself, or proclaim the knowing touch of the Rue de la Paix. It may have a cap, like that of a lady in a French print, or fall in clouds of tulle from under a little wreath, such as might be worn by a child Queen of the May.—Chap. XXII¶23

A manual of etiquette – with hints on politeness and good breeding by Daisy Eyebright (The content can be related to

Manners made easy for teens: 10 steps to a life of confidence, poise and respect by June Hines Moore

Action Plan

Posted in Uncategorized on January 31, 2010 by billylai

 In my research, I purposed to research on the understanding of this topic, the existing work or document on this topic and quantify the needs or importance of etiquette and manners at a general aspect for all people.

In developing the work, I planned to design a series of customised graphics to restructure the information found and present the content in a more interesting way, which will be easily accessible and understandable by the audience.

Aim and objective

Posted in Uncategorized on January 31, 2010 by billylai

Etiquette and manners are something known as a norm, but they are not written laws or rules. This behaviour could be some kind of common sense that people would rarely spend time to study it. It is normally taught in school or acquired from upbringing by others. Apart from that, it is not something people would spend time to study or read about. There were always many people complaining about those who neglect to have good manners, such as jumping queue, littering, etc. although there were a number of books written on etiquette and manners, they used to be lengthy of words and explanation. There were no single books that practically illustrate the text visually in images. It is actually quite boring to read it.

Etiquette and manners are something very essential in our daily life. It relates to our daily activities about how we behave and politeness. With good behaviour and manners, people learn how to respect each other and this makes everything easier and the society better. It is something that cannot be neglected or put aside. In my point of working on this topic, I would like to produce an effective and influential design that could bring up the importance of etiquette and manners, and attract the audience to develop interest in it.

I think it is best to develop an information design in this programme of study. An information design can clarify the topic to the audience through transforming sentences of words into visual language (graphic display). This can better illustrate the topic, so as to allow a wide range of audience to easily understand the message conveyed and be motivated by the design.

IPS : Etiquette and Manners

Posted in Uncategorized on January 31, 2010 by billylai

Define the topic

Etiquette is a code of behaviour that delineates expectations for social behaviour according to contemporary conventional norms within a society, social class, or group. A rule of etiquette may reflect an underlying ethical code, or it may reflect a person’s fashion or status. Rules of etiquette are usually unwritten, but aspects of etiquette have been codified from time to time.

Manners, in sociology, are the unenforced standards of conduct which show the actor that you are proper, polite, and refined. They are like laws in that they codify or set a standard for human behaviour, but they are unlike laws in that there is no formal system for punishing transgressions, other than social disapproval. They are a kind of norm. What is considered “mannerly” is highly susceptible to change with time, geographical location, social stratum, occasion, and other factors.

Manners involve a wide range of social interactions within cultural norms as in the “comedy of manners”, or a painter’s characteristic “manner”. Etiquette and manners, like mythology, have buried histories especially when they seem to have little obvious purpose, and their justifications as logical (“respect shown to others” etc.) may be equally revealing to the social historian.

“Etiquette tells one which fork to use. Manners tells one what to do when your neighbour doesn’t”

‘Etiquette has been define as a code of laws which binds society together — viewless as the wind — and yet exercising a vast influence upon the well-being of mankind.’